Women.

We raise our women to be kind. We teach them to have a smile on their face and burst with personality, but to also hold back. Profanity is only spoken in silence and opinions become a foreign language. Mean mugs are unacceptable, they create wrinkles in your face. We explain that a pretty face is a gateway to a husband and that the spotlight is not a place where women thrive because behind every great man is an even greater woman.

We tell our women to keep quiet. We put fingers over their mouths and tell them a soft-spoken woman is more appealing. We raise them to be cautious and warn them of the world that surrounds them. We coach them on the predators that could hurt them, but do not stop our men from becoming them. We monitor their skirts with rulers in institutions and give them an age limit until they can wear lipstick, then we blame them for being a distraction in an uncompromising situation and tell them, “We cannot save you… and won’t”

Our women are compromising when they should not be. Our women are patient when they should not be. They are taught that baby making and cleaning is second nature that is learned in the womb. They are taught that yelling is a man’s job and he will forever have the upper hand.

Women are taught to be delicate, gentle, and pleasant. We teach them to be watched and not be watchers, to be judged and not judgers. We teach them to be flowers without thorns, to grow without nourishment, to bloom without sunlight. We teach our women to be giving without looking for reciprocation. Our women are taught to be a social norm… and then we hold them to a standard that they did not create.

– TORI

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